The Cult Of Choice Feminism.

“You are free to choose but you’re not free from the consequences of those choices.”

Unknown Source | Sabrina Carpenter’s Short n’ Sweet Era

From Billie Ellish’ Soulja Boy Halloween costumes and crocodile tears to Miley Cyrus’ Raw Chicken Twerks to Bonnie Blue’s Sex Petting Zoo to Lilly Phillips 101 men in one day to Sabrina Carpenter’s Man’s Best Friend Album Cover. White woman are doing the same things they always do—creating a spectacle. The attention has proven to be very lucrative but also highly demanding. That means positive or negative attention can be traded in for cold hard cash. I’m here to tell you I have not read one essay with Sabrina Carpenter’s new album cover on it—NOT ONE. The moral panic and white woman antics is just one big distraction to me. A distraction that only seeks to serve them at all times. I’m a sex positive person and I’m someone who has seen this happen within the black community already [Karrine Steffans, etc.] I’m unimpressed by white woman getting the quote on quote jezebel treatment . I’m more concerned about the lack of sex education and how sex-negativity is going to derail that even more. Involving myself in the moral panic does nothing for my position as black women nor does it help marginalized communities get access to education, care or treatment. Usually the consequences of these white woman’s actions will fall on the backs of other groups—while they will seemingly leave unscathed back to their white woman roots of conservatism and mainstream christianity, other groups will be left to face the scrutiny and backlash from their heydays.

We saw this same scenario play out with the Kardashian family as they lined up to get bbl and braids in order to snag a black musician or nba player only to run back to their milk maids, lawyer inheritance and white woman social ease. As long as feminism has existed, white woman and I distinctly say white women because they never involved us in their feminism to begin with, have never agreed on what direction to go. As with all feminist movements there will always be polarizing opposites and differing viewpoints. The first polarization that we see in feminist history happened in regards to labor unironically. ¹In the 1908 case, Muller vs Oregon unanimously upheld an Oregon law that limited women to a 10-hour workday. The reasoning was sited as women’s biological difference from men. The evidence a “Brandeis Brief” which presented medical evidence and psychological support that long work hours were harmful to women’s health. This case garnered major backlash from feminist due to it perpetuating gender based stereotypes. ²Fifteen years later the 1923 case, Adkins vs Children’s Hospital would overturn the ruling as it sought to recognize women’s equal rights to enter into their own contracts. On August 18, 1920, the nineteenth amendment would grant women the right to vote decades after the Seneca Falls Convention—this did not include black women [discriminatory practices such as literacy test and poll taxes inhibited them]. This is just a brief history of the cases that shaped white feminist labor. Quite frankly, they always fought for the ability to work and make money for themselves. I won’t say this is a good or bad thing because as I said black women were excluded from the first and second wave of feminism. Black women have always had to work whether as slaves, indentured servants or sex workers. I think it’s important to talk about what feminism is and what it isn’t. I haven’t taken any feminism classes and I’m not an expert. Everything from this point on is just my opinion, a well-informed one but an opinion—so you can disagree.

Billie Ellish For British Vogue (2022)

Some quick definitions from my understanding:

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CHOICE FEMINISM

-The belief that the individual choices of women are inherently feminist.

RADICAL FEMINISM

-The belief that patriarchy and male domination oppresses women and seeks to abolish current systems.

LIBERAL FEMINISM

-The belief that women should seek equality within the existing social structure.

BLACK FEMINISM

-Also called Womanism, the belief that mainstream feminism does not center the experiences of black women due to the intersection of racism and sexism. Notable frameworks or branches: intersectionality, social justice, literature as activism, spirituality.

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During the fourth wave of tradewife feminism that was popularized on social media during the late 2010s and 2020s—it always seemed a bit off to me. When women would say “it’s my choice be a tradwife or a housewife” I never trusted it. If feminism never existed you’d be relegated to that position anyways [sorta] so is it really a choice? Is choosing to go backwards choice? In my opinion it’s not. Feminism is essentially about moving forward; it has always been like technology or science. Honestly, womenhood functions like a technology—as the goalpost is always moving. When social movements or politics change so does “what is considered a woman.” Being a SAHM or SAHW is not feminism to me. It’s heteronormative. It falls right in line with the system. I’m not defending either position I’m just making a point. I’m not against being a SAHM or being a single, childless cat lady. I’ve wanted to be both at different times of my life. I’m really just taking a critical look at choice feminism because someone needs to.

³In 2006, gender studies scholar and feminist Linda Hirshman criticized choice feminism in her essay “Choice Feminism and the Fear of Politics” in saying:

Understood as an orientation, choice feminism has three important features. First, it understands freedom as the capacity to make individual choices, and oppression as the inability to choose. Consequently, as long as a woman can say that she has chosen to do something, it is considered by choice feminists to be an expression of her liberation. Second, since the only criterion for evaluating women’s freedom is individual choice, we should abstain from judging the content of the choices women make. It is definitionally impossible for a woman to choose her own oppression; all choices she makes are equally expressions of her freedom, and therefore equally to be supported. Finally, this view of freedom is supported by a particular historical narrative: it is the women’s movement in the past that has made it possible for women to make free choices in the present.

She argues that choice feminism emerged out a response to radical feminism. Choice feminism is motivated by fear of being called too extreme or too exclusionary. She confirmed that what I had been feeling about choice feminism is true—it’s really a fallacy. Choosing your own oppression is not a choice inherently, it’s the status quo. Choice feminism is not really feminism at all; it’s like a pseudo-feminism. It masquerades as feminism while still choosing oppression and upholding the patriarchy. That brings me to my criticism of Onlyfans creators Bonnie Blue and Lilly Phillips. Recently, Bonnie Blue was banned from Onlyfans for producing extreme challenge content and going against their creator guidelines. I guess it should be obvious that what Bonnie Blue and Lilly Phillips are doing is not feminism. I can’t be the only one who sees through the pick-me behavior but it looks a lot like choice feminism because these women are unmarried and providing for themselves. They’re both intentionally catering to the male sex fantasy, which may not be entirely bad, except that Bonnie Blue is problematic as hell. After her 1,057 men feat she planned to have a human petting zoo where she would allow men to do whatever they wanted to do with her while she is caged up. I think the point that I want to stress is that these women are looking for moral panic. They’re treating sex like an extreme sport. An extreme sport is any activity that involves significant risk, physical challenge and a lot of skill. That’s why they are going to extremes to do these challenges like it’s an olympic sport. They understand that just having plain ‘ole nasty sex or having a freaky gangbang is not going to cut it in this attention economy. We can watch porn anywhere for free. Sex content is so easily accessible. Any old amateur can make a $10,000 on Onlyfans with a significant following. So, they have to go the extra mile if they want to make any kind of money. That means controversy, appealing to the madonna-whore complex [Bonnie Blue saying she wants to sleep with women’s husbands] and making a spectacle out of already highly risky sex work. I think Bonnie Blue is also intentionally catering to the unconsensual fantasy. If anything is harmful that is what is going to be the most harmful—that will create more problems for women as she is targeting impressionable barely legal 18-years olds. Young people who have no kind of sex education or go most of it from porn.

When Lilly Phillips was interviewed by Charley Ross about the backlash she recieved Ross wrote:

Lily has raised eyebrows with her self–proclaimed ‘feminist’ status, but she argues back that she is empowered to do what she likes with her body, and earn money from it if she so chooses. ‘I would never have anything to say about what other people are doing with their bodies or with their time unless, obviously, they're harming people,’ she says [Lilly Phillips]. ‘So it's funny that these “feminist ladies” are saying that what I'm doing is not empowering… we shouldn't be putting people down for having a lot of sex. Is that not what we're trying to get away from?"

She also went on further to say that people shouldn’t express concern for her because she feels empowered to do what she does. She said that people should turn their attention to real victims and give them sympathy. This sentiment would be great if it were genuine. I cannot really harshly judge these women, as I have no room to being a sex-positive person myself and that fact I don’t believe in the madonna-whore complex. So, the issue here is not about a body count or her wanting to have as much sex as possible with men. I’ve enjoyed sex with strangers in the past—that being in the safest way possible with clear, current std results and condoms. My criticism is the way she tried to act like she cares about real victims. I don’t think feminism is inherently independent. That’s the difference between black feminism and white feminism—black women are socialized to be more collective because of our black and african ancestry. We are community and group-focused [not all of us]. While, I understand a lot of black women’s choice to be selfish and self-centered and especially SELF-PRESERVE. We still have been socialized because of our history, racial heritage and socioeconomic status to think more collectively. This means we think about how our actions affect the next woman [okay, this is a stretch]. I would rather say that we have had to think about the next black woman because our status in society depended on it. Black women are often grouped together [no matter what we do] and have to face harsh stereotypes. By todays standards somebody like Karrine Steffans should be a multi-millionaire with a makeup line and a Bravo tv show. White feminism has always inherently been selfish and exclusionary. That is my big issue with choice feminism is because it lacks nuance and is inherently afraid of being critical of the status quo. I do think we should take Lilly Phillips advice, don’t worry about her. She also said she makes her content for men—duh!

In that same interview she said:

‘My target audience is not young girls at all. They’re not the people I want to be promoting my work to. You know, it's the males. So I find that tricky when, like, people are like, “What are you putting out to these young girls?”

I do appreciate that she said in this interview that sex-workers and pornstars should be humanized more. She also expressed appreciation for people being nice to her and treating her like a person. Like I said, the words sound nice but I’m still very skeptical. I definitely understand that in that line of work it comes with a lot of social judgment and dehumanization; I do think that people should check the vitriol they have for sex-workers because the hatred is dangerous. I am not criticizing these woman but their choice feminism. I do think it’s a bit contradictory asking for humanization but also not doing the safest things like verifying ages, test results and taking care of your body during and after these challenges. I get it I’m being a bit naive but nothing is going to stop these women from doing what they want with their body especially when it’s so lucrative.

Whose Choice?

Bille Ellish for British Vogue (2022)

I cannot help but to think back on a book I read about the causes of prostitution. In the book it talked about how two of the main reasons women do sex-work are poverty and lack of education/employment opportunities. While sex-work is a deeply interconnected and complex issue, we can draw a strong correlation between these two risk factors. If you add to that being apart of an intersection like being black and a woman, it makes the risk even greater. I believe that in that way choice feminism is inherently privileged. When I talk about choice on here and I say “I don’t have choice, I have to choose.” It may sound confusing but it’s not. I make choices everyday. I have been propositioned multiple times for sex-work, by both men and women. To me, sex-work is not empowering and it reminds me to too much of my trauma [the transactional nature of it]. I choose not to engage or participate in it in any way. I still don’t judge people who do it or women who decide that it is for them. You are just not going to sell me on the idea that it is empowering. I don’t believe you. Now, the money [just like getting money from any other job] is definitely the empowering part. Choice feminism can only work if you have privilege. White women have privilege and those privileges can vary but being we live in “white supremacist capitalist patriarchy” they still get the flexibility to change their image. I don’t think I’m to far off in saying that the more privilege you have, the more choice you have. I’m careful not to give these women any more attention than they already have because even our moral panic is just lining their pockets. I really think people should start listening and believing black women more—our perspectives are vital and nuanced because living at an intersection will do that to you. I think we could benefit from re-examining what choice feminism is and how it’s distracting from the work of real feminism.

FINAL NOTES:

I don’t consider or call myself a feminist. I think often people see my resistance as some sort of rebellion. There are aspects of gender-based stereotypes, heteronormativity and patriarchial violence that I resist. I think of feminism as existing for white women and what black women participate in is something different. Black women historically have occupied a unique social place [sometimes called psychological androgny.] Most black women are socialized to work, get an education or be entrepreneurs while also being told the same messages to be caretakers, nurturers and prepare to become wives. We are now in a position where we can choose between either options [or choose both of them] but majority of us still don’t have “choice” unless we move up in status or have other privileges whatever those may be. Anywho, there’s two things you can expect from a white woman, a set of tears and a rebrand. I feel like choice feminism is a bit deceiving and it’s important that we be critical about it because it’s grown in popularity.

1. https://www.law.cornell.edu/wex/muller_v_oregon_(1908)

2. https://www.law.cornell.edu/supremecourt/text/261/525

3. https://www.cambridge.org/core/journals/perspectives-on-politics/article/abs/choice-feminism-and-the-fear-of-politics/E6BD4B851D564D34312391F8F9692FCE